My Joyful Mysteries, and A Revolution of Real

Today…I left the house at 845 am and didn’t get home until 730 pm. 

Today…I laughed with one of my closest friends in Starbucks trying to get a good selfie. 

Today…I looked up the word antagonist and for a word that rhymes with meth. 

Today…I was a Mom, an employee, a Chauffeur, and was thankful for my quesadilla maker. 

Today…I was patient with my kids, and traffic, and tonight I really miss my husband who is still at work. 

Today…I pretended I wasn’t thinking about some things that are worrying me.

Today…I listened to my entire family talk and converse in Spanish and I hardly understood a word, except I loved every minute of it. 

Today…I prayed a lot. I prayed for the things I don’t understand, and for the broken who will never understand. I prayed for the sick and the lonely. I prayed for the apathetic and empty. 

Today…I wasn’t the thinnest or prettiest, I wasn’t the best at anything. I wasn’t mother of the year, and I didn’t finish the laundry…again. 

Today…I didn’t long for the past, or wish for anything different. 

Today…I was just here. And it was enough. For today. 

Today…I was thankful for you. 

Curly has decided his newest weapon is called “Fatal Fashion.” 

So basically not wearing a shirt, and where underwear is optional. And typically forgetting to put on two socks. 

However lately he’s been dressing in a combination of catchers gear and football gear when he’s “Rudy” in the backyard. He’s got talent, and imagination. 

Same kid, when we go to dinner parties or when he goes to play dates ALWAYS wears a cup…because “you can never be too careful.” 

Moral of the Story: I am madly in love with who he is.  

Thank you God for My Micah. 

“Faith grows where it is lived and shaped by love. That is why our families, our homes, are true domestic churches.” -Pope Francis

No matter how many times I’ve failed…as long as I’ve done these four things right- I’ve done okay. 

Things like laughter and joy that fills up a whole room. We are drawn to this laughter, as he finds happiness in every situation and doesn’t want to miss a thing…the most joyful boy in the world. 

Things we try even when it’s hard and never giving up. My brave oldest son who keeps going, trying new things, while being the most faithful person I’ve ever known. 

 Things that happen in the little moments… between the lines, writing chapters in our own stories through just being together. She can’t sit next to me without having her arms around me, this little love– the strongest girl you’ll ever meet. 

  Things that hit you as you notice his face changing, looking older, still I cling to the fact that he still has freckles sprinkled across his nose- and so much little boy in him. But in many ways his future is going to be as amazing as him.  This one is one of the most incredible people I’ve ever met. 

These things. ❤️ These children of God. ❤️

The best four things I know. 

I have sat here the past hour trying to even begin to put my thoughts in order to write today. 

When I started this write every single day for an entire year I jumped on a constant thought I’d had for a long time before…The revolution of being Real. Of embracing the messy and beautiful. Of showing the raw parts of ourselves in order to stop the facade of fake. To love, even when it hurts. Especially when it hurts. 

I don’t know that it’s been a revolution. And I don’t know that it’s had much of an effect on anyone other than my family who sees me praying about writing, talking about writing, and then actually writing. 

So here’s what’s real in the State I live in. 

Yesterday evil entered a classroom. Yesterday lives were stolen. Yesterday shots were heard, and hearts were broken. Oregon is heartbroken. And to a certain extent the whole nation is, because all of it is the worst part of society.

 Of course the minute news came out, before we even knew how many victims there were- every “opinion” was popping up left and right. Get that play on words? 

But spare me your discussions. I’m  about change. But let’s BE PRESENT right now. 

Let’s take care of the victims, the families,  and the survivors. Because that’s what the first responders, the doctors, the community are doing. And they need less talking more doing. 

Let’s stop the talking just for a minute- all your ideas and links to articles are super great, but quite frankly I don’t give a shit what anyone thinks right now, unless it’s about taking care of those who were lost and those who are here. 

Do not get me wrong I am all about doing the right thing. But the right thing right now is to remember lives were lost, and families are still here. That yesterday felt like fall in the morning, and by noon the sky was black and people didn’t know if their daughter, son, mom, dad was okay. 

Monday, you can write a bill, or your congressman, or even use any quote you want. But today…sit in silence, attend a vigil, pray, give blood, donate. 

Do something for…

Them.  

 
Maybe I haven’t been a game changer. Maybe writing every day has just been one more thing. But I have learned real life lessons…that there are real life super heroes among us, that evil will never win, and that it is our job to shine the light. To look out for one another, to love one another, and to remember. 

No debates tonight. 

Remember their Names. 

God protect us all, and have mercy on us. 

UCC I am praying for all of you, and Roseburg I stand with you…
Want to donate: 
Chris Mintz is a hero in this story. He was shot multiple times trying to protect people. You can support his recovery below. 

https://www.gofundme.com/s75ge9y4

Here is another survivor who is in critical condition but her family is hopeful! 

https://www.gofundme.com/xd569d7w

For the victims and their families. 

Home 2

https://www.gofundme.com/s75h7a8k

And use the google for so many other ways. 

  
My heart…my prayers…are with you UCC. 

She wrote me a “poem.” 

  
In the past two days I’ve been on the wrong side of some sharp edged tongues. I’ve cried. A lot. And I’ve felt the hurt from a barrage of hateful insults and the tone of one passive aggressive dig. 

It’s reminded me how crucial our words are to the heart of those around us. It’s reminded me of who I want to be. I don’t want to take someone’s joy…I want to lift theirs. 

Because someday we’ve all gotta stand before God, and I want him to see how I chose Love. How I chose my words to build, not break. The last two days were freakishly hard, but the perspective I’ve gained about who I want to be has been tremendous. 

Please God help me to bring Joy.

always. 

I don’t want to talk about today. 

But I have to say…on the worst days, my kids bring me strength. 

Micah made this for me. Out of cardboard and a paper towel. He put a picture of his Dad and me from 19 years ago on top of it…I will cherish it for ever. Grateful for the open hearts of Children. Grateful for Micah. 
my god. my hope. my strength. 

life on earth is limited. 

BUT GOD IS Eternal.