Today when I was driving there was a spot as I merged on the freeway where the other lane was supposed to merge into mine. I was driving when suddenly the car in the other lane that should have merged behind me sped up and cut me off. There was no car behind me, and it gave that person maybe a few extra seconds getting closer to where they were going.
As I continued to drive I thought about how often we try to get ahead of others…
We need to be just a little better. A little faster. A little stronger. More together. More organic. Blah…blah…blah. Just to be more than someone else.
And sometimes the people we love, or the people who trust us, are the people who suffer the most.
We are so busy trying to get ahead we become focused on road rather than on the scenery.
We don’t stop…we’ve gotta keep going…make that deadline, finish that task, look good on paper –but fail the people who need us because we don’t stop, we just keep driving.
Conversation becomes just talk. Words lose their significance when we never really mean what we say. When we never stop and be present for people who need us. It’s just words.
Connection becomes a checkmark, and not a necessity, and we make others feel small. Insignificant. Because we can’t connect with them, and won’t make time.
Ok I get it. You’re busy. I’m busy. We all are busy. But how often is our busy- time wasted by things that don’t matter?
You will never lie on your deathbed and say “Man I wish I’d kept up with the Kardashians…” Or with your snap chat followers…or some random celebrity you follow on Twitter. Really you won’t. Those people won’t show up when you need someone.
We have become defined by entitlement and privilege and we’ve forgotten to look around. We’ve forgotten how to listen as we spew endless enlightenments and repost “truths” that we’ve never ever followed up to see if they are actually true! Because we are too busy to actually research and look for the truth.
And we’ve forgotten how to set limits because we’ve settled for “cruise” and have given up control for the right reasons.
You know what? It’s ok to say no to our children. It’s ok to slow down. Its ok to work out. Its ok to follow your gut. It’s ok to take care of yourself. It’s ok to let someone else be good at something else, maybe even better than us. Maybe we’ll learn something. And it is ok to fail, and admit we’ve failed…as a friend, as a coworker, as a parent, as a spouse. And then we apologize and we start again. We ease into it, we merge and go slower.
I’ve been letting Jesus take the wheel for a while…because I can’t drive this life alone. Every time I’ve tried I’ve failed. I don’t mind being the passenger.
I do my best to ensure that my words are followed by my actions, because the people along the journey mean something. I will take my time, because in the end, the people that have stopped along the way and helped me, will be the people who will take care of me and my family if something happens. They are my flares. My safety belts.
I will be there for them. If I say I’ll do something or be there…I will be there. I will back my shit up with a ton of love. They are worth that.
So slow down…you don’t need to get anywhere that fast. The Final Destination will come soon enough.
To God be the Glory.
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August 10, 2016 at 4:17 pm
Papa John
Once again, a great message Kristin – esp. for guys who “have to” conquer the road, and “be right” because it’s our ‘duty’ to be sure that people.around us are “properly” informed….. not to.mention our natural urge “to fix” others, instead of taking a good, deep breath…. and really listening. It can all happen, a little more likely, when we go a little (sometimes a lot) slower.