Lately I’ve had many days where I’ve written half or almost a full post and I can’t post it. 

I feel this incredibly urge to write it, but know deep down I am not supposed to post it…yet. 

Also lately, I’ve had many moments of feelings of what my daughter calls the scary creepy crawly’s. The feels of absolutely anxiety mixed with terror that settles deep in the pit of my stomach. Things I’m reading, the views people are taking, and the division’s WE are creating are terrifying. 

It’s real. It’s poignant. 

But I’m not ready to post that real yet. 

 I’ve also had amazing feelings of burning, and desire for what is the real call of someone of Faith. Not just saying it, believing and living this…and the fear is real, but the grace and hope that places fire in those who are living and breathing examples of ALL in. 

All in, even when I am so inadequate in so many ways. 

I received a text from a friend today asking me to remind her of that…where she’s supposed to be. 

Being ALL in. 

I may write this blog, but I read your emails, I get your texts, I hear your real almost everyday and I know…this is burning in you too. 

And that means sometimes hearing the Truth about ourselves is going to suck, and speaking the truth is going to be even harder. 

But I feel deep down under my skin, into the depths of my heart that we need it. We need to be ready for the truth…and somedays that means walking away from toxic relationships, looking at ourselves and opening our eyes.

And being all in. 

This is when we start to get past the shallow and starting seeing. 

That doesn’t mean we have to take on everyone’s else’s stuff, or take on the weight of the world…That’s God job. But we need to open our eyes. We need to be aware. And we need to guard ourselves with prayer. 

We need to pray…gather in prayer…and pray. 

Stop right now…and pray. 

And I don’t know why you’re praying. I don’t know what your real is…but we all need more of that. 

We need to unify in prayer. 

We all need more Him. And less us.

We all need God. 

Yesterday I watched my daughter stand on the sidewalk. Her entire life is right there…she Is little and her life is always a reminder to me of what living each day fully and completely means. 

I pray she always knows what a gift her life is…and that she always needs God. When she looks at her future that she turns to Him, in prayer- in moments of fear and moments of joy…I pray no matter where her life takes her – that is she is ALL in for Him.

That is my prayer for all my kids. For all of you…

This is When we Begin.